Bursting Batteries
It turns out video games are more detrimental to our health than we once thought. We knew they could rot our brain and turn us into coin collecting, turtle-stomping drones, but u/Zillahzillah’s parents claim that playing for more than an hour is a huge Nintendon’t if you want to keep your hands attached to your arms.
At least u/Zillahzillah had that precious 55 minutes of fun to look forward to every day. We hear some parents lied their way out of getting a console in the first place by saying their televisions weren’t compatible with a Nintendo 64, and that breaks our gamer hearts because every kid should grow up swinging Bowser by his tail and memorizing the C-button sequence to “Zelda’s Lullaby.”