Raising Humble Kids Isn’t Hard, Here’s How

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As a parent, you always want the best for your kids. You not only want to make sure that they’re happy and lead fulfilling lives, but you want to make sure that the turn into incredible people too. And one of the ways you can do that is to ensure that they always remain humble. It’s not always easy to achieve, but ensuring that your kids are kind, loving, and polite is easy enough, and so why shouldn’t it be the same for making them humble? If you want your kids to be both humble and happy, here are some ideas for achieving it.

Stress The Importance Of Listening

First of all, you’re going to want to make sure that your children are great listeners. This is definitely one the of hardest things to do, as kids aren’t always great at listening first and speaking second – they often want to share what they have to say. But, if you can teach them to listen first, they will always be humble. But not being selfish, but instead putting others first, they will always live a humble and happy life.

Appreciate Hard Work

Next, you’re going to want to instill in them what it means to work hard and why it is important. It’s easy to feel like you should do everything for your kids, but you’re not helping them become the best they can be by doing that. Hard work is definitely one of the life skills that you need to teach them. If they can appreciate and value hard work in life, it will go a long way in keeping them grounded.

Teach Them To Help Others

You should also do what you can to show them how important it is to be selfless in life. Helping others is always an important part of leading a rewarding life. So, it’s a skill and consideration to show them early. Charitable organizations are great to work with here. The work that they do, like MERS Goodwill with providing opportunities, is so important for the community. By giving back and getting involved in charity projects, you will show how important it is to help others and be humble.

Show Them The Value Of Money

One of the things that can spoil people in life is money. Money is often a way that people can fall off track and lose their focus on what’s really important. So, to ensure that your kids stay grounded, especially when it comes to money, be sure to teach them the value of money young. This Parents post should definitely help with that. But giving a set allowance, showing them how to spend and teaching how many works can definitely help here.

Value Their Relationships

A huge sign of a humble person is the importance they place on their relationships. If you want to ensure that your kids grow to be humble adults, you need to stress the importance of valuing the relationships they have in life. It’s easy to see the value in materials things, but material things aren’t what matters most in life. So, teaching them to value their relationships will go a long way.

Co-Parenting Tips: How to Handle Opposite Rules in Other Parent’s Home

I have been co-parenting for about 14 years. With this experience of co-parenting have come some challenges, struggles and personal growth. You see, co-parenting isn’t easy by any means and when you co-parent with someone who is completely the opposite of you, it’s quite frustrating to say the least. I have been co-parenting my sons for about a handful of years but I took what I learned from the first child into my co-parenting situation with the father of my sons. Since I have watched co-parents put the kids in the middle for so long, argue and fight consistently and place their own kids under the impression that they are not free to love both parents, I work hard to share tips on what has worked for me and what I have learned in the last 14 years. Today I am sharing co-parenting tips – how to handle opposite rules in other parent’s home as a means to guide you towards having happier, well-balanced kids who don’t feel guilty loving both parents.

Co-Parenting Tips: How to Handle Opposite Rules in Other Parent’s Home

Get Over Yourself

That may sound harsh and well it is meant to be. If you are co-parenting with someone who destroyed you emotionally it will be difficult to get over your emotions. I say it should take about two years to get over the hurt that was caused in the breakdown of that relationship. Once you hit the two year mark of co-parenting, you should have been able to work through the hurt and be a better co-parent to your kids. Take up to two years to see a counselor, work through demons from the relationship and figure out a way you can come to peace with knowing your ex hurt you but the kids shouldn’t pay for it. You are just as imperfect as your ex, so get over yourself.

Never Utter a Mean Word

Kids hear everything, even when you think the kids are not listening, they are! Learn to never utter a mean word about the other parent whenever the kids are awake. Part of co-parenting is working together to raise your children without harming their self-esteem and love for their other parent. While you may see fault in the co-parent, the kids do not see this. All kids see is that their Mom and Dad love them, care for them and are there for them. Allow your kids to learn the faults in their parents on their own, it is not up to you to brainwash the kid to hating their other parent. If you must vent about the co-parent do so on a kid-free weekend/night or when they are fast asleep and there’s no chance they will hear you.

Accept the Other Parent’s Rules

You and the other parent will rarely have the same exact rules. Learn to accept that the other parent has their set of rules and it is not your place to step on their toes. If your kids come home saying that they are allowed to do something at their other parent’s house and you are not okay with it, set up a meeting to discuss this concern with the co-parent in a way that leads to resolve. When the co-parent refuses to budget on their rules, simply accept it and teach your kids that Mom and Dad have different rules. That Mom and Dad live in different houses and that’s part of having two homes, they get to have different rules and it’s kind of exciting, right?! Make it fun but respectful. Encourage your kids to respect rules regardless of which home they are in.

Learn from the Co-parent

Sometimes you can learn from having different rules in the other parents home. In my scenario for example, my first born is my eldest of 3 children so how I treat her is different than her Dad because she is her Dad’s only child. Get what I mean? Each of us could possibly learn something from another because of our differences in our daughter’s “birth order” for each household. Take time to learn from your co-parent, each of you should still be able to learn something new in the parenting world without attacking. Sometimes the answer on how to handle opposite rules in the other parent’s home is to figure out why they have that rule, why they think that way and truly hear them out. You can still keep your own set of rules, but understanding why they have these rules will help you be a better co-parent to your kid. When you understand why the co-parent has this rule, you can better teach your kid to respect that rule because you have taken the time to hear why the co-parent has this rule.

It isn't easy to co-parent with someone who is the complete opposite of you #coparenting Click To Tweet

There you have it a few ways you can learn how to handle opposite rules at the other parent’s home. Mind you, co-parenting is rarely as easy as I make it sound typing it out on paper but I am blessed in that I have one co-parent who I constantly have to comprehend where he’s coming from to try to respect and teach my daughter to respect him while the other co-parent and I can communicate, get on common ground and be peaceful at all times when it comes to raising our sons. The joy of having opposite co-parenting scenarios is that I can try my best to help others see how co-parenting doesn’t have to be a nightmare. You truly can find middle ground to make it work!

Co-Parenting Tips for Divorced Couples

Joint custody arrangements after a separation or divorce can become quite stressful. Each parent will have to learn how to let go of the desire to have their child all of the time. Sharing children after a divorce or separation is a matter of fact, unless there is a case of abuse to the children or ex-parent. More often than not the court wishes to have the two parents create a parenting plan that will work for them and their children. The court systems will usually try to get each parent to communicate, most states require the parents to take a child impact seminar that is geared towards teaching co-parents to parent together, treating their relationship much like a business.

Parent Influence Co-parenting Tips for Divorced Couples

Co-parenting isn’t easy because it’s never easy to have to communicate and share children with the person you no longer wish to be with. This is the number one reason why a divorce or separation should always be well thought out, be certain the relationship is truly dead or else co-parenting can become quite a nightmare when either of you start to date again. Now that you have become a divorced or separated parent, it’s time to learn a few co-parenting tips that can help two parents raise happy, healthy children without drama.

Separate Feelings

When you are co-parenting the situation becomes less about emotions and more about a business arrangement, the business of raising children. Feelings don’t have any place within the co-parenting structure, learn to set your feelings of protection, hurt and anger aside to ensure you can co-parent in a way that is best for the children. Your feelings and your ex-partner’s feelings no longer matter as it pertains to each other. The only thing that matters is that the children’s best interest is at heart and that you two can communicate to make easy transitions for the children without feelings getting in the way.

Only Discuss Children

Now that you are divorced or separated, it’s important to remember that your conversations should be strictly about your children. Even if you had an amicable divorce, discussing each others date nights or woes in life may not be a good idea. Learn to keep the topic of discussion on children only as a means to avoid the hurt feelings or drama that can be created when you talk personal or start pointing fingers about the hurt feelings stemming from the broken relationship. Keep an unspoken rule, if you will, that any conversations heading away from children will not be discussed and stick to it.

Parent Influence Blog - Co-Parenting Tips for Divorced Couples

Think Before Speaking

There will be times your ex-parent, known as the co-parent now, will make you angry. It’s normal to have moments of intense rage or hurt feelings in moments with your ex when co-parenting together. Remember you two aren’t married any longer for a reason! Your children shouldn’t have to pay for these moments, keep any negative thoughts to yourself. If you must discuss how you feel about something, talk to a friend in a place where the children will not hear you. Children need to feel safe, secure and confident about loving both parents without ridicule from the other parent.

Use Written Words

If you and your ex-partner are simply not able to come to a peaceful place of communication there are ways around it. Have a family member exchange the children, learn to communicate in email only unless an emergency arises. Often times making it a requirement that if one of you has an issue with something it is emailed or hand written in a letter to the other co-parent creates a more peaceful, business-like approach to co-parenting. When we take time to write down what we are feeling in a high emotional moment, we tend to relax and sometimes realize the issue isn’t stemming from a current date scenario, it’s past feelings getting in the way of co-parenting.

Remember it’s About the Children

Keep in mind, at all times, that co-parenting is no longer about you and your ex-partner. Co-parenting is strictly about raising your children in a way that allows them to thrive. Co-parents will not always have the same rules at both households nor will they always agree on how to raise the children, this is perfectly acceptable. Remember that unless your children are truly in danger, how the co-parent chooses to raise the children while in their care is their right. Learn to respect each other as co-parents who have the best interest of the children at heart.

May each of these co-parenting tips for divorced couples help guide you back to reality and cope with the world of co-parenting in a positive way.